one year

Today marks one year anniversary of my puppy's journey over the rainbow bridge. And I still miss him every day. Truth be told, my loss has gotten easier to live with, and essentially the guilt associated with my decision is almost nonexistent now. A year after his death, I am no longer cursing the heavens for the low blow it delivered me, I no longer have blame for anyone, and I finally realize that the reason for the decision was not made from haste or irresponsibility, but out of love. 

You see, my parent's dog (my puppy's sister) passed away a few weeks ago, and I was there to watch her cross over. She was in a lot of pain, and we knew that she was going to pass. Her body was shutting down, her bowels stopped working, and when I looked into her eyes, she wasn't there. She passed surrounded by love. My love.

But, today I am not here to paint the sad picture of a dog dying or even go into detail of my own puppy's passing, you can read all about that here, instead I want to say how grateful I am that my puppy didn't have to go through that type of passing. I am grateful that he was surround by me, my husband, and a very loving and caring vet that cried with us. 

I am also here to tell him (and the world) that I still love him. To thank him for my sweet Ellie. To tell him that Lil Man still talks to him. To tell him that my phone background is still him. To let him know that I can still feel him. To let him know that even though I have my days, I am ok.

Happy one year anniversary in heaven, Duce.
We love you & always will.