One month

It's been one month...

One month since I've felt your fur under my hand. One month since I've kissed you. One month since I've heard your bark. One month since we've played ball. One month since I've gotten puppy kisses. One month since I've seen your loving face.

One month since I've said good bye.

I can't tell you how much I've missed you in the past month. Or how much I've cried since you left. Or how much I've longed to just cuddle with you.

But I can tell you that with each day, it's getting a bit easier to live with the hurt. I can tell you that I'm starting to heal, a little. Unfortunately, every time I find one of your balls, I do feel the need to break down into a puddle of hurt and sorrow. But I takes time. I can tell you that I can finally talk about you without feeling like I have a rock in my throat. That part is certainly easier. Maybe it's because I want people to know how much of a good dog you were. How much we loved you.

You were an amazing dog, Duce. I hope you know that. You were so loving and fun and cuddly and comforting when I was sick. You were my baby. And will forever be.

It's not fair that our time with you was so short. But, with each passing day, my decision to let you go makes more sense. You were in pain. My selfish nature wanted to keep you around... but in the end, Daddy finally made the decision. He didn't want to. He wanted to keep you around! He loved you. And still talks about you.

Gav often wonders how you are doing in heaven. He asks about you. He says he misses you. He says he doesn't want another dog because he loves you.

I hope you are happy my friend. I hope that there are plenty if treats and no shortage of people to play fetch with. I can't wait to see you again and hope you are up there looking down on us.